Scared
What comes next, and what do we do?
700%. That’s the increase in people reaching out to The Trevor Project’s crises services the day after the election.
Appropriately, this image has been going around. It was relevant before the election, and now even more after.
I wrote before the election about what a Trump presidency would mean for me and so many others. It’s worth a read if you haven’t already, since that’s now the world we live in. Even worse, since the Senate definitely went Republican, and the House probably did as well, and of course the Supreme Court already tilts right. Anyways, see that post here:
Also relevant, I went viral this week on Twitter, for saying the following:
Cis friends, I need you to hear this: Putting trans people in camps won't look like putting trans people in camps. It'll look like banning HRT (just like mifepristone), then criminalizing possession of estradiol or testosterone w/o a prescription (just like marijuana).
It'll look like banning gender marker changes on ID, then criminalizing the use of ID that has a gender marker different than the one assigned at birth.
It'll look like laws banning public drag, but are overbroad and include me going out in a dress and makeup.
It'll look like increasing acceptance of employment and housing discrimination against trans people, pushing more of us into homelessness and sex work, both of which will also be increasingly criminalized.
The headlines will be:
"[name] charged with felony drug possession"
"[name] sentenced to 5 years for fraudulent identification"
"[name] convicted of repeated public indecency"
"[name] arrested for prostitution"
"[name] apprehended for trespassing"
It will lead to high (but not total) incarceration rates of trans people, just like we have today for black men due to the "war on drugs", and increasingly also have for unhoused people.
It will, as always, affect the more marginalized first.
And for those who manage to follow the rules, they are effectively submitting to a virtual prison. They won't be truly free, they just will have preserved their freedom to move about, at the cost of all of those other freedoms.
If you value your freedom, value mine.
It’s my most seen substantive tweet in my time there, with over forty thousand likes and over a million views.
So much support came from friends and strangers, and I was glad so many people listened.
But there were two types of negative response that chilled me.
“Good”
That’s it. People who, quite simply, want trans people to be imprisoned. This is scary, obviously. But it’s honestly not the scariest kind, because they are at least clear about their intentions and hatred of trans people. Their hostility is transparent.
“You deserve it because…”
This response is much more insidious, because it lays the groundwork for our oppression based on completely unrelated factors.
Two examples:
The pendulum is probably going to swing too hard the other way but the trans community did this to itself. You should have left the kids and women’s sports and spaces alone.
and
Good. Should have thought of this before going after kids , women’s safe spaces and opportunities. Bye
These are terrifying to me, because they’re actually punitive, for unrelated and sometimes non-existent things. “going after kids” is completely undefined (and isn’t happening), and “women’s sports” are something vanishingly few trans people compete in, and the rules governing them are entirely made by cisgender people.
As for women’s spaces, once again, they’re arguing for prison sentences for things like taking HRT and having ID that matches my gender, but justifying it based on me using the women’s restroom.
It’s dizzying logic, but important to recognize - these are actual people advocating for my arrest, in part due to the actions of others. It’s retribution.
It gets worse
Many also pointed out that it actually could get much worse. Specifically, if the government decides to treat trans people as mentally ill, and involuntarily commit us. This has been done in this country before, and is still done for certain mental illnesses.
Undoubtedly, such treatment would include some version of conversion therapy, along with denial of HRT. At worst, it could include forcible administration of the wrong hormones (e.g., forcing me to take testosterone).
These are my nightmares now, and I get to live with them for at least the next four years.
Best case scenario
And even if no one arrests me, they could still deny me insurance coverage (my insurance is through the Affordable Care Act), which would make my upcoming Gender Confirmation Surgery cost tens of thousands of dollars. Similarly, I still need treatments for hair loss, which will also be upwards of $10K. For many trans people, these costs are prohibitively expensive, even if they can afford the much lower costs for HRT.
It is worth noting that some democrats or typically left-leaning publications1 are moving to throw trans people under the bus. They’re arguing that standing up for trans rights is what cost Democrats the election. Two problems with that:
There’s no data to support that (and some data to debunk it)
Democrats didn’t even actually stand up for trans people. As far as I’m aware, Kamala Harris didn’t use the words “trans” or “transgender” in her entire campaign. Tim Walz did on his podcast episode with We Can Do Hard Things, but that’s it, as far as I know. They left us to take hundreds of millions of dollars in attack ads, without responding.
You can read more about this from
here:
What can you do?
Ok, so what can you do about any of it. Here’s some, and feel free to leave a comment below with more ideas or questions.
What we do NOT need
Ok, so some people are well-meaning, but miss the mark in what support looks like. If you’ve done any of these already, it’s ok. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, apologize if you need to, and then move forward.
Here’s a few things not to do.
Don’t downplay our fears. Many trans people follow the news closely and simply know a lot more about the issues affecting us than you do. Please don’t tell us not to be afraid unless you have done your homework and are sure we are wrong. Then, do it gently.
Don’t play “both sides”, unless you are sure that the “other side” is actually both real and relevant. Then, be willing to discuss in good faith.
Don’t try to tell us “Oh but you don’t really need that surgery” - each person deserves to own their own transition.
Don’t spread misinformation about us, even accidentally. If you don’t know, say you don’t know, then ask me or another trans person. Seriously, I will answer a million good faith questions.
(let me say this one carefully) Do not only listen to the “good” trans people who ask little of you, or the ones who consistently attack other trans people. I’m not saying these voices have nothing to say. But if you are only listening to them, you’re missing the perspectives of most of the community.2
Don’t get too scared of saying the wrong thing that you end up saying nothing. Silence lets people think you support their anti-trans position. Again, if you get something wrong, listen to the correction, and then just do better next time.
Don’t negotiate on our behalf, e.g. “Yeah I agree hormones for teenagers is wrong, but for adults it should be ok.” Follow the data.
Don’t just offer “thoughts and prayers.” I believe prayer helps, but we also need action (more on that in next section). As with so many things, if all you offer is prayer, and no real help… well I’ll let the Bible itself speak to that.
Don’t overtly support anti-trans organizations and people. When trans people tell you that JK Rowling or Elon Musk are doing great damage to trans people, please believe us. If you want details so that you can help others understand, great - but don’t just push back because it’s someone you like.
Don’t get bored of the fight. We’re in it, and it’s going to be a fight for years, maybe decades.
Don’t let your trans friend think you don’t care about them.
Don’t out people who aren’t public (whether they are transitioned or not). This is always true, but right now takes on increased importance, as some trans people consider going “stealth” (being transitioned, but not telling people they are trans) for safety.
What we DO need
There are so many things you can be doing, and I’m thankful to people who have already been trying. What we really need is state governments to pass or strengthen sanctuary laws, and we may need community networks to help trans people pay for the care that they need.
So here are ten things you can do:
Do contact your elected representatives and tell them trans people matter to you and you want them to pass strong protections, including funding health care.
Do volunteer with your local LGBTQ+ center, or donate clothes to one - many have “clothing closets” where queer people can take clothes for free - a vital research for trans people early in transition.
Do, if you are family of a trans person, join your local PFLAG group.
Do be *visible* in your support for trans people. Make the world know that trans people matter. T-shirts saying “Protect trans kids”, Bumper stickers saying “Trans Lives Matter”, or “I love a trans person,” etc. The trans flag is good but many people don’t know what it means. Social media posts are excellent (you can always ask me to review if you want!). We need people who don’t support us to be confronted with the reality that many of their friends do. My friend
just made a new “Love Thy Neighbor” design in trans colors, and I love it! You can get it on shirts, stickers, hats, etc at her shop. (link not sponsored)Do donate to trans people’s crowd-funding efforts to pay for their surgeries or HRT, or their moving expenses if they are fleeing a red state.
Do, if you have a spare room in a blue state, start thinking about being ready to take in a trans person from a red state.
Do correct misinformation about trans people when you hear it. Check with me or another trans person if you aren’t sure.
Do push your church to be a strong voice for trans rights.
Do check-in on your trans friends and family regularly. Let them know they matter to you and that you will be there for them. Be aware of mental health services for trans people, like Trans Lifeline.
Do keep learning, and sharing what you learn. This includes amplifying trans voices like mine, as well as putting things in your own words. Reminder, I have a YouTube Channel now as well - go check it out and subscribe! A new episode just came out today!
Do “get comfortable being uncomfortable”3 - read sources that push you a bit, that make you feel a little bit challenged. That’s where we grow. If something makes you feel angry, sad, embarrassed, or other “negative” emotions, sit with them and explore them. Why is it making you feel that way? Emotions are always valid, but you choose how you respond to them.
Do stay on top of trans related news. Two sources you absolutely need are
and Assigned Media. Support them with a paid subscription if you are able - their work truly is vital to the community.
Speaking of which:
If you are transgender
Things are going to get hard. Your number one goal should be to keep living life. Second would be helping others do the same. Activism will be important, but only if you’re taking care of yourself. But for practical ideas to protect yourself, check out Erin Reed’s article a lot (Yes, I cite her often. No, I don’t know her. Just a big fan of her work!)
Something I will add is to go ahead and make those gender affirming care appointments you’ve been putting off. Remember that if you’re a trans femme person and want GCS, your surgeon may require electrolysis hair removal that can take 6-24 months to complete.
What’s next
Many of you are like me - you weren’t affirming before, but now are trying to be supportive of LGBTQIA+ people going forward. This is good! Glad you are here! And to some extent, you can plea “I didn’t know better” for before you were affirming. But now you don’t have that excuse going forward.
“When we know better, we do better”, as the saying goes. We need you to engage strongly given just how bad the targeting will likely be.
Let’s work together to fight for my rights and yours!
-Celeste
The Atlantic and the New York Times have both been criticized in the past for their anti-trans coverage.
If you want to learn more about this, learn about “Respectability Politics” and learn what a “Pick me” is.
A quote perhaps originated by the Navy Seals, or at least attributed to them.
Very helpful list!
I’ve thought of you and your family a lot this week, it’s been heartbreaking to realize every day more and more people will be negatively affected for just being who they are. Fighting this feeling of helplessness has been hard too, I appreciate you giving really great examples of what to DO. I will do the very best I can to help.